Post 11

June 30 --

Saying No It is interesting... I don’t know what the cause is, all I know is I am realizing more and more how hard it is for me to say no to people and how annoying it is when I don’t. Yesterday I got really angry and I wanted to blame people for doing this or saying that, but the truth is... if I had just said no to them to start with, I would have avoided all the conflict. So, I have set a task for myself to talk to the people who I need to set boundaries with or say no to. Two down and one to go. Both people have handled it really well. I guess I knew all along that they would. I feel so uncomfortable, but I think this is an important lesson for me. I’m not sure why I have trouble saying no to begin with, but the sooner I learn how the better.

Crows They are everywhere here. I love to watch them interact with each other and listen to their cawing. They are like little angry bullies. They fly around pushing other birds away, screaming in their face, and stealing their food. Today, I swore I heard a frog croaking, but it was just another crow. One day, one of them was inching its way closer to my empty plate and I looked at him and said, “Don’t even think about it buster. Go away!” Then he said, “CAW-CAW!” and I said, “Oh yeah, CAW-CAW to you!” We continued like this for a while until he finally flew up on a fence turned his butt to me, pooped, and then flew away. (Did I already tell this story??)

Postcards I finally found some postcards. I will hopefully have them in the mail by the end of the week, but who knows how long it will take to get there. I’ve heard mail here takes a loooong time to travel. For this reason, I’m going to try to pack all the gifts I bring home in my baggage. This means I won’t be bringing as many things home as I’d like to. :(

July 1 --

Can you believe I’ve already been here 3 weeks? I really thought it would drag by, but it is going faster than I thought it would. I have decided to extend my stay here for one week. This will do several things -- #1 give my body a week to recoup from Panchakarma treatment before major travel, #2 give me a chance to meet Amma, #3 spend a day or two in Trivandrum to see what city life is like. I’m sure Jesus doesn’t like the idea, but he is being his usual patient and supportive husband and not uttering one complaint.

There are a lot of stray dogs around here. There is a really nice couple (the husband is from U.S. and the wife is from Italy) and they have a dog of their own. They brought him with them, his name is Lucky. Anyway, they have a soft spot for animals just like me. So the other day when I saw this poor mangy dog who was wet, cold, hungry, scared, and sick I thought I have to help this poor thing. I spoke to the couple about how to do this. It turns out they’ve had a lot of experience helping the animals around here. They have the number of a taxi who will actually allow dogs in his vehicle and the number of a good vet in Kollam. They say vet treatments are super cheap here. Also, the lady I ran into who told me about a teaching position that is open here said she would come along if she could to help out. She said she is pretty busy right now so she may not be about to come, but she’d pitch in on the cost. Americans are such suckers for animals. There is another dog -- she looks to be in good health -- she is small, white with orangish brown spots. She reminds me of a little Ella. She is very submissive to the humans, but has now taken control of the Ashram territory and is keeping all the other dogs at bay. She knows that I will stop what I’m doing to give her a scratch behind the ears, so she will purposely walk in front of me so I’ll trip over her if I don’t stop. She is very playful and mischievous. One morning I busted out laughing because Deklan was doing his mantra and she quietly picked up his walking cane and was running around with it in her mouth. Poor guy had no idea she took off with it. If there was anyway to take this dog home with me, I would... but then I’d do that with the small kitten that runs around meowing at everyone too. Ahhhhh, I wish I could be rich so I could help every person and animal I come across? I think I’d own a rescue ranch for animals and offer scholarships to students of all ages.

I’ve been losing weight. This was a nice surprise. I really didn’t think I would since I’m not allowed to do much in the way of physical exertion. But as usual, I found that just a small, but consistent change in my diet is all it takes to lose the extra padding. I almost never eat to the point of feeling stuffed (which I used to do all the time) and I’ve significantly cut out the sweets. I still eat a nice treat here and there and of course I have a little sugar in my tea, but other than that -- I really don’t have a chance to eat sweets. Tonight for example, my dinner was a mango, that’s it. I think that digestive tract cleaning probably took off a couple inches from my waist, just by itself.

Other than that one day of hell, the rest of my treatments have been heaven. My absolute favorite is the oil bath. See if you can image how gorgeous this feels -- You are lying on a large wooden table, there are three Bramacharinis, one at your feet with a bowl of warm sesame seed oil (with almost 100 different herbal medicines added) and two on each side of you with rags. They all start chanting and the two on each side start working together in perfect synchronization dipping the rags in the warm oil and then dripping it all over your body. Occasionally they will drape the rags over your shoulders or knees while they rub the oil into your skin. The one at your feet is constantly warming and replenishing the oil for the others. Then you turn over and they do the same to your backside. Ahhhhhhhh! One woman said it was the ONLY time during her whole treatment that she was happy. This treatment is amazing for sore joints.

I’m seriously considering trying out the silence thing. I have some questions about it first, like is it ok to chant or sing along in the temple or is it expected that no words leave your mouth at all? I guess, I could do it how ever I see fit. Then, I was thinking I would take it one day at a time. If I complete one day successfully, then I’ll try for another day and just see how long I can go or how long I want to go. This way I’m not disappointed if I don’t reach a goal I’ve set for myself. I figure I’ll get my ticket extended first and then I’ll give the silence thing a go.

I want to ask about the chanting/singing thing because there is one song (they sing it only in the mornings after Archana) that I love. It is so much fun. It’s about killing demons. I’ve always had a violent side to me. I like to imagine “stabbing their eyes out and then kicking them in the neck when they’re down!!” (That’s an inside joke -- sorry, I couldn’t help but include it here.) I’ve been practicing how to say the words so I can sing along and I would hate to give that up. Also there are is a chant that I really like (and I can actually say the words) and I’d like to continue to be able to speak it. It is all done in Sanskrit. How cool is that? I believe Sanskrit is the first known language.

The chant/prayer I like goes like this:

Om lokah samastah sukhino bhavantu (repeat 3X)

Om santih, santih, santih

Which is pronounced:

Om lokaha somastaha sukino bavantoo

Om shanti, shanti, shanti

Which means:

Om, may all the beings in all the worlds be happy

Om, peace, peace, peace